Since the Busola Dakolo rape allegation saga went viral I have decided to keep quite and watch as the event of things turn out to be but felt compelled in my heart recently to write this.
Rape is evil; apart from the fact that sexual immorality is a sin before our maker, I would say that rape is a bigger sin even though all sins are sins before the Lord! I say rape is a greater sin because it is wickedness against the weaker party; it is better one consciously does a thing whether good or bad rather than being forced to do it outside their will!
Since the emergence of this issue, many other women have been coming out with their own rape incidences; they did not find the boldness to express themselves before because they felt intimidated by the person who has meted out this wickedness against them. I have read other rape stories I have felt the agony these young women faced expressed in their stories! Whether it happened recently or donkey years ago the fact remains that they lived and have been living with this pains and agonies!
Some were raped by their fathers and their mothers helped cover it up, some raped by people they looked up to as spiritual father, some raped by neighbors but could not tell their parents because of fear, and many other stories.
Having seen all these and have given a careful though to this I have come to conclude that Busola Dakolo was not raped! Do we shout at the word "Rape" and bring out the accused to kill them because we are hurt by other experiences? Don't we give though to the story line of the rape incidence?
In her story there was no element of force nor resistance! You might say she was just a 16yr old and might be too young to resist but I bet to disagree. At 16yrs I was already writing my WAEC examinations and at that age I was fully aware of my decisions and all I chose to do. A young girl at that age can be easily deceived into sex but not forced!
Before you crucify Fatoyibo on the sound of "RAPE" please let's go to the scriptures:
Deuteronomy 22:23-26 KJV
If a damsel that is a virgin be betrothed unto an husband, and a man find her in the city, and lie with her; [24] Then ye shall bring them both out unto the gate of that city, and ye shall stone them with stones that they die; the damsel, because she cried not, being in the city; and the man, because he hath humbled his neighbour's wife: so thou shalt put away evil from among you. [25] But if a man find a betrothed damsel in the field, and the man force her, and lie with her: then the man only that lay with her shall die: [26] But unto the damsel thou shalt do nothing; there is in the damsel no sin worthy of death: for as when a man riseth against his neighbour, and slayeth him, even so is this matter:
If Fatoyibo deserves to die then so does Busola!
Why this allegation of rape?
Busola wants to present Fatoyibo as an evil man and exonerate herself; presenting herself as a victim and Fatoyinbo as the predator, but according to the Bible "our guide", she has no moral right to point a finger at the man on the account of rape!
There are cases where young girls have been cajoled into sex and disappointed in a relationship then turn back and call it rape! Heart break is not the same as rape! There are times a girl will be loving a guy and all the guy wants from her is sex; when she finally gives it to him, he immediately dumps her and leaves her heartbroken, that is a different matter, it is not rape!
Apart form the fact that there was no element of force or refusal in the rape incidence, it happened again! Even the second time, no pressure! What kept you around a man you're supposed to be hating for raping you, a man that forcefully took away your virginity "according to you" that it happened again? Of all the cases of rape I have heard, I have not heard of such easy ones; victims of such stories are victims of heartbreak not rape!
Why will I never speak against Fatoyibo?
There are a thousand and one possibilities that Busola had a sexual relationship with the pastor. Why Busola was hanging out with the married pastor I can't tell. Was she in love with him? Probably yes! Was she expecting him to send out his wife and marry her? Maybe not; but she liked him anyway and could not help it. I know how hurtful it will be for her to just move on with her life and forget about the married pastor seeing that he was her first love! Their destinies can never meet seeing that he was a married man!
If probably my assertions above are true, am I now supporting the man of God for toiling with the heart of the innocent little girl? Not at all! Sexual immorality is a sin and as a man who is supposed to be a custodian of morality by his placement in the Christian faith, he has not done well and is on this ground that I may agree with Nathaniel Bassey that God is sanitizing His church!
But who am I or Nathaniel Bassey to conclude on a matter that happened about 20yrs ago? You can be correct about a person but might not be current! He might have settled it with His caller and left that way of life; that's why we must be careful when consenting to cooperate sin! The chief conspirator can leave at any moment and reconcile with his/her maker while we have already been deceived into sin and might even loose our soul in hell! God forbid! Even though there's a popular believe that the blood of the deceived will be required from the hands of the deceiver but the deceived has already been deceived and might loose their soul and the deceiver is already on their way to eternal rest because they made peace with their maker and sincerely repented of and turned from their sins!
I see this as an unrestituted past mistake coming to hunt a man! As for Busola Dakolo, SHE WAS NOT RAPED! Her story line is not a story of rape! Even the Nollywood will not sell that story line when acting about the issue of rape!
Permit me to make another assertion!
Timi Dakolo never knew his wife ever had any relationship with the pastor before; he just got to find out recently! The thing hurt him (it's common, every man feels the same when they hear stories about their wife's exs), he couldn't take it that his wife had a relationship with the pastor then decided to extort the man and blackmail his wife into agreeing to do the interview as the only way he'll forgive her for hiding such thing from him all this while! That's why sometimes it's good to tell your betrothed of your past life and relationships, if he's still interested in you fine, if not, fine; at least you save yourself stress of him getting to find out about anything in future. Some people disagree with this; they say let the past be in the past! Well, that's a topic for another day.
We all keep our fingers crossed and our prayers going on for God to intervene in this matter and save the body of Christ this shame and embarrassment!
Pray for Pastor Fatoyinbo
Pray for Busola Dakolo
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